EPISODE 23

A couple of weeks after my fishing trip with Les, I got a call from Keith. 

“Michael!” he boomed, from wherever in the hell he was calling from, Taiwan – I seem to recall.  “Has Bosco talked you yet about the conference in Vegas?”

Well, of course he hadn’t.  But this didn’t exactly come out of left field either.  Since the telephone call we’d had about giving the product away, Bosco had been in full flurry mode, calling up Web developers, graphic artists, copywriters and just about anyone else he could corral into this new project.  It was clear that he was working feverishly to launch this new sales program in a hurry.  SlipNot had been experiencing a slow but undeniable decline in sales over the previous two years and the growing fashion that single men had adopted in the early years of the 21^st century of shaving their heads wasn’t helping matters.  Bosco felt strongly that even though his new plot would lead to a return of that market share, he also realized it was going to take a good six months to a year before SlipNot’s customers would (a) buy into the plan and (b) make it work for them, thereby (c) increasing the number of orders they placed to SlipNot for new product.

This task was made even trickier because we were going to be asking studio owners to buy into this new scheme without providing them with any new creative material.  Normally when SlipNot asked its customers to jump off the cliff with them with a new marketing plan, they provided TV ads, radio spots, newspaper/magazine slicks and comprehensive training for making the whole package work.  This time around, there would be no advertising campaign roll out to back the effort up.  Bosco and Keith both felt that no one would ever respond to a “something for nothing” ad campaign.  Consumers were too sophisticated, Bosco argued.  I pointed out that plenty of people still clicked on the links in emails sent from the descendants of colonial era African royalty who offered to share in their $60 million estates.  My objection had been met with stony silence.

“Yeah, “ Keith continued before I could respond, “This is going to be a lotta work, Michael.  I’m going to need you and Allan to call all of our big clients. Richard is working on a list.  Get them to commit for a Sunday through Tuesday meeting in Las Vegas, starting on October 17^th.  We’ll get a block of rooms at the MonteCarlo.  Promise them reduced rates if they book by the end of August.  Richard’s got a list of places for receptions and parties, but the key thing is to build up some buzz about the new marketing plan.”

“Should I let them know what it is?” I asked.

“Shit, no! They’ll never come if they think it means giving product away.  That’s where you’re going to have to be careful.  Both of you!  You can tell them that we’re unveiling a new plan, but you can’t let them know what we’re going to do.”

I’ve always marveled at the fact the people will spend money to learn something that isn’t adequately explained before they have to commit.  You don’t think they will?  Just think about all of those infomercials in the early years of the 21^st century that promised the viewer the ability to build a financial empire on no-money-down real estate purchases.  The success of that scam essentially led to the devastation of the entire economy just a few years later.  People will spend cash anytime they think there’s a shortcut to the big time.  And that was the rationale for the whole scheme.  In ’04, the economy was booming.  People were making money on Wall Street, buying and flipping real estate and betting on commodity futures.  Hell, even new restaurants were showing profits!  It was that good.  Start with a semi-credible get-rich scheme and throw in a Las Vegas mini-vacation with all of the low-level debauchery that it promises and you have the basic ingredients for a successful business conference.  Keith knew this.  He and Bosco had been doing this for 20 years together and in 2004, everybody was making money.  Everybody except for SlipNot’s clients.  Keith was very worried about it.  There was an enormous supply of fresh capital in the streets and it appeared to be passing him by. 

“Hey!” Keith yelled in my ear.  I hadn’t been paying attention, but my Fearless Leader had been trying to tell me to do something for him.

“Sorry, Keith,” I stammered.  “It’s noisy here.  I couldn’t quite hear you.”

“Yeah, yeah.  Well listen up good now, okay?  Sit down with Les and Richard today and see if you can brief the rest of the sales team.  I want everybody in on this.”

“You want Les and his group making calls?” I asked, hoping like all hell that Keith didn’t.

“No.  This is for you, Bosco and Allan.  I want you guys and Richard to make up the list and then I want Richard out of this, so that he can get on with his other work.  He spends too much damn time on these projects as it is.  You follow?”

“Got it.  Do you want anyone on the sales team involved at all?”

“No, Michael, not yet.  I want them aware of what happening but I don’t want you to get them making phone calls.  At least not officially.”

I started to laugh.  Keith was absolutely right.  If we told the sales team that there was a conference coming up, they’d been so damned excited that they’d never be able to contain themselves.  Sometimes the best way to spread the word about something is to tell people that it’s a secret and that’s exactly what Keith had planned.  Within a week, the sales staff at SlipNot will have gossiped this conference into near legendary status.  It will spread among the customer base at fantastic speed.  Clients will be calling us, demanding to be let in on the secret for fear that they were going to miss something. 

“Sure, sure!” Keith said.  “It’s like a take-away close.  You tell people about something, then tell them can’t have it right then and BAM!  It’s the only thing on Earth that they want.  Just make sure than Les and his crew knows that their clients have to call you or Allan to get in.  This’ll be the easiest conference you’ll ever sell.”

            After another 15 minutes, Keith had given me a rough sketch of how this was supposed to pan out, but he also mentioned that the final planning would be left to Bosco.  I made a mental note to set up some time with him later that day.

The next installment will be posted on February 10.

If you'd like to read the entire book today, GO HERE.