Bosco was thrilled with my report
on Firefly.
"You're right, Michael. Those guys are geniuses. Our site will do a lot of the same things, by
the way. But I want you to think about
how we're going to sell it because I'm putting you in charge of that, effective
right now."
"Sure. Care to give a clue as to just what in hell
it is I'm supposed to be selling?"
"Leads."
"Leads?"
"Michael, we're building the
largest lead generator on the Web. It'll
draw from all over the country...shit, from all over the world! There are millions of people who want to do
something about their hair that radio, TV and newspapers can't reach. Those people don't read newspapers to begin
with and they sure as hell don't listen to the radio. They watch television, but they don't watch
the commercials. The remote has killed
that. But, do you know who they
are? They're a demographic group that's
going to feed our industry for the next 10 years."
Bosco stopped for a second and
looked carefully at me.
"You have no idea what the
fuck I'm talking about, do you?" he chuckled.
"That obvious?"
"The blank stare was a
giveaway. Don't worry about it. You're going to learn a lot about them, very
soon."
"Who?"
"Generation X, of
course!"
You have to remember, it was
1995. Bill Clinton, the first baby
boomer in history was the president of the United States. There was every reason to assume that another
"boomer" would follow him and like the WWII generation, we (being a
boomer, I'm authorized to use the possessive plural here) were likely to run
this damned country for a good long time to come. After all, the World War II generation had
delivered Eisenhower, Kennedy, Johnson, Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, and George
H.W. Bush. How the hell were we supposed
to know that the next, and likely the very last boomer elected was going to be
George W. Bush and that he was going to drive the country's economy right into
a shit pile? Thus ended the Boomer Era. Thanks, George. But this was a
while before all of that was going to happen.
In '95, most boomers had every expectation that, having driven the
economy and just about everything else for the past 10 years or so, that we
were apt to be doing so for a good long time to come. But Bosco was a bit smarter than the rest of
us, recognizing that the generation behind the boomers was actually more apt to
fuel everything, as the general population aged. He wanted to know how to sell them on the new
hair of the 21st century.
Bosco had hired a guy named Pierre
Tabacot to take over making the calls for his studios. Pierre was, as everyone appeared to me, a
very tall fellow with a thin face that featured a well-maintained goatee. He wore glasses and always appeared to be
squinting. It turned out that this was
due to the fact that he had no health insurance and his eyeglass prescription
was quite out of date. He was a freshly
minted University of Vermont graduate with a liberal arts degree and little or
no real experience. His father was from
Quebec and his mother hailed from Burlington.
Apparently, “Dad” had heavily influenced the naming of his favorite
son. Pierre was fairly self-conscious
about his heritage, his age, his relative inexperience…in short, he was a bit
of a wreck. Still, he was very bright,
eager, and possessed an earnestness that, had it not been so innocent, might
have driven most people completely nuts.
He was ready to take on the world though and often made note of that
fact. Unfortunately, his domain was
limited to the realm of balding men who watched infomercials on late-night
television. This wasn't exactly the
career path he'd envisioned when he had declared himself a marketing major just
two years prior. He had dreamed of a
career in a Boston or a New York advertising agency. Instead, he had landed in Bosco's little
four-room office in White River Junction.
Times being what they were though, he took the job and worked his ass
off.
There is a major difference between
working hard and working efficiently and Pierre didn't quite grasp it. While he was often in the office up to an hour
earlier than either Bosco or I, and he was usually still on the phone trying to
book appointments as the two of us made our daily exit - Pierre floundered
about, never reaching his monthly quota for the first six months he worked with
us. His frustration grew, as did
Bosco's.
One afternoon, Bosco called Pierre
and I into his office. He asked me to
close the door before I sat down.
Clearly "Daddy" was perturbed.
Pierre sat perched on the edge of his chair, his long legs tucked
underneath while his long body leaned out toward Bosco's desk. He held a little notebook in his hands and as
was his habit, he readied himself to take precise notes of all that was said. You had to admit that the guy took his job seriously.
“Pierre,” Bosco began. “I think you know that all of us want you to
succeed. Michael will tell you that I’ll
do anything to get you to where you need to be so that can happen.”
Bosco shifted in his chair. He was uncomfortable with the situation. Above all, Bosco Ignatz hated confrontation
with the people he hired. I knew this
from my own dealings with him. I had
been then and continue to this day to be a complete pain in the ass. My sales numbers have always saved me,
although I have often deserved to be shown the door anyway (and in many cases,
found myself sent packing, in spite of my ability to rack up higher sales
numbers than most of my cohorts).
Pierre’s problem was that he really didn’t go for the close when he had
a prospect that was ready to book. He’d
keep talking around the subject, trying to make sure that it was okay for him
to ask for the order. He was, simply
put, afraid of being told, “no”.
Bosco was afraid too. He might actually have to fire somebody and
that was something he’d never done before.
Bosco coughed nervously and continued.
“The problem Pierre is that you’re
just not booking enough appointments.
I’ve coached you, so has Michael.
But your numbers just aren’t there.”
Pierre looked confused. “What do you mean? I booked 5 people yesterday.”
“True,” Bosco replied. “But it took you 7 hours. I need you to book at least one an hour to
make this work.”
“But I made a lot of calls.”
“Also true. You’ve been very good at smiling and
dialing. But that’s not what I
need. I need appointments and you’re
just not getting it done. This isn’t an
isolated thing either, Pierre. You’ve
never averaged one appointment an hour in all the time you’ve been here. I don’t know any other way of putting it.”
“Okay. I’ll come in a little earlier tomorrow and
make more calls.”
“No, that’s not it. Pierre, I pay you by the hour already, so
supplying yourself with more billable hours doesn’t help me unless you start to
book at the rate I need.”
“But I’m working as hard as I can,
Bosco!”
“I get that. The issue isn’t your effort. It’s your output that’s got me worried. You’re not keeping up with the goals we’ve
set for you and I don’t know what to do to motivate you to change that.”
The next episode of SlipNot will be published on July 14th.
If you'd like to read SlipNot in its entirety, GO
HERE.
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